Set fire to your hair Poke a stick at a grizzly bear Eat medicines that’s out of date Use your private parts as piranha bait Dumb ways to die, so many dumb ways to die Get your toast out with a fork Do your own electrical work Teach yourself how to fly Eat a two week old unrefrigerated pie Dumb ways to die, so many dumb ways to die Invite a psycho-killer inside Scratch your drug dealer’s brand new ride Take your helmet off in outer space Use your clothes dryer as a hiding place Dumb ways to die, so many dumb ways to die Keep a rattlesnake as pet Sell both the kidneys on the internet Eat a tube of superglue “I wonder what’s this red button do?” Dumb ways to die, so many dumb ways to die Dress up like a moose during hunting season Disturb a nest of wasps for no good reason Stand on the edge of a train station platform Drive around the boom gates at a level crossing Run across the tracks between the platforms They
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