Your Favorite Martian - Mr. DoucheBag

You’re a douche bag, do-douche bag do-do-do-do-douche bag. You’re a douche bag, do-douche bag do-do-do-do-douche bag.

Hey Mr. Douche Bag, why’s your ego so massive?

You know it’s 2 AM and it’s dark outside. You don’t need those sunglasses.

Yeah we all remember that hot chic you hooked up with once

because you went on to brag about it for months and months.

Yeah we all get that you think it’s impressive

but ain’t nobody impressed with how much you’re expressing.

Buying Smirnoff Ice for girls half your age,

telling all your douche bag friends that you “still got game.”

Dear Mr. Douche Bag. We all agree that you are a dumb a-s. Why can’t you see that!

you’re a douche bag, do-douche bag do-do-do-do-douche bag. You’re a douche bag, do-douche bag do-do-do-do-douche bag.

Dear Mr. Douche Bag do you find it necessary to shout into your Bluetooth

or boast about high school rugby “and I would have went pro if it weren’t for my bum knee”.

And why you got to complain every single time your not getting laid.

You douche bags are a lot of the same. “Dude let’s go. This place is full of grenades” Always trying to look cool, like it’s a full time career.

That’s why your Facebook pic shows you chugging a beer.

You got your gold chain and your wife-beater on

So you can fist pump your way to the tanning salon.

Dear Mr. Douche bag. We all agree that you are a dumb a-s. Why can’t you see that you’re a douche bag, do-douche bag do-do-do-do-douche bag. You’re a douche bag, do-douche bag do-do-do-do-douche bag.

nconsiderate, ignorant, you drink you get belligerent,

you think anybody finds you amusing? No, no, no. Not even a little bit.

You always find a way to stop all the fun

like, when you scream “party foul” at the top of your lungs.

Dear Mr. Douche Bag, I caught you bragging again.

Trust me man, nobody gives a d–n what frat you were in.

You claim you hang with celebrities when you don’t know any at all.

“But dude I’m totally banging George Clooney’s sister in law.”

No you’re not–come on.

Dear Mr. Douche Bag. We all agree that you are a dumb a-s. Why can’t you see that you’re a douche bag, do-douche bag do-do-do-do-douche bag. You’re a douche bag, do-douche bag do-do-do-do-douche bag.

Hitting on other girls when yours is in the room.

You’re a douche bag do-douche bag do-do-do-do-douche bag

Walking in the club grabbing all on your junk.

You’re a douche bag do-douche bag do-do-do-do-douche bag

Refusing to let go when she says no.

You’re a douche bag do-douche bag do-do-do-do-douche bag

Cut me off in traffic then flipping me the bird

You’re a douche bag do-douche bag do-do-do-do-douche bag

“Dude it’s George Clooney’s sister in law, I swear, come on where the hell is my protein shake?”

You’re a douche bag, do-douche bag do-do-do-do-douche bag. You’re a douche bag, do-douche bag do-do-do-do-douche bag.

Hey Mr. Douche Bag, why’s your ego so massive?

You know it’s 2 AM and it’s dark outside. You don’t need those sunglasses.

Yeah we all remember that hot chic you hooked up with once

because you went on to brag about it for months and months.

Yeah we all get that you think it’s impressive

but ain’t nobody impressed with how much you’re expressing.

Buying Smirnoff Ice for girls half your age,

telling all your douche bag friends that you “still got game.”

Dear Mr. Douche Bag. We all agree that you are a dumb a-s. Why can’t you see that!

you’re a douche bag, do-douche bag do-do-do-do-douche bag. You’re a douche bag, do-douche bag do-do-do-do-douche bag.

Dear Mr. Douche Bag do you find it necessary to shout into your Bluetooth

or boast about high school rugby “and I would have went pro if it weren’t for my bum knee”.

And why you got to complain every single time your not getting laid.

You douche bags are a lot of the same. “Dude let’s go. This place is full of grenades” Always trying to look cool, like it’s a full time career.

That’s why your Facebook pic shows you chugging a beer.

You got your gold chain and your wife-beater on

So you can fist pump your way to the tanning salon.

Dear Mr. Douche bag. We all agree that you are a dumb a-s. Why can’t you see that you’re a douche bag, do-douche bag do-do-do-do-douche bag. You’re a douche bag, do-douche bag do-do-do-do-douche bag.

nconsiderate, ignorant, you drink you get belligerent,

you think anybody finds you amusing? No, no, no. Not even a little bit.

You always find a way to stop all the fun

like, when you scream “party foul” at the top of your lungs.

Dear Mr. Douche Bag, I caught you bragging again.

Trust me man, nobody gives a d–n what frat you were in.

You claim you hang with celebrities when you don’t know any at all.

“But dude I’m totally banging George Clooney’s sister in law.”

No you’re not–come on.

Dear Mr. Douche Bag. We all agree that you are a dumb a-s. Why can’t you see that you’re a douche bag, do-douche bag do-do-do-do-douche bag. You’re a douche bag, do-douche bag do-do-do-do-douche bag.

Hitting on other girls when yours is in the room.

You’re a douche bag do-douche bag do-do-do-do-douche bag

Walking in the club grabbing all on your junk.

You’re a douche bag do-douche bag do-do-do-do-douche bag

Refusing to let go when she says no.

You’re a douche bag do-douche bag do-do-do-do-douche bag

Cut me off in traffic then flipping me the bird

You’re a douche bag do-douche bag do-do-do-do-douche bag

“Dude it’s George Clooney’s sister in law, I swear, come on where the hell is my protein shake?”